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Talk:Wally Palladino/@comment-37.201.228.117-20160807141304
Okay, so I have not read anything (it's really a lot) but from what I have read is your OC quite overpowerd (He beats Yugi? It's an absolutely No-Go to make an OC stronger than the main protagonist. In every Fandom. It's some sort of a unwritten law also is a rule on the OC website → Rules: No swearing, being rude, or making your OCs so powerfull so that the characters from the real show look ridiculous. (Example: Beating Yugi Muto with ease.). You also DO NOT break Canon like this (for example giving your OC a God Card) and write things down without explaining it. There is nothing wrong with making your OC a little bit known before the start of the series (the emphasis is on something, you should not exaggerate) by allowing your OC to participate at several smaller and bigger tournaments (but your OC shouldn't win ALL of the tournaments. NO ONE is that good.). What I do not quite understand is, why does Wally wear a katana all this time? I mean sure he was teached by his father but isn't it enough to make it a hobby of your OC? Does he really NEED to wear it around? That's quite unreasonable :/ Alright, his parents are killed by theses guys. It's kinda clichee but keep going. Why is Keith forcing Wally to become one of them? There is no real explanation besides the fact maybe, that Wally has the choice. (And why doesn't Wally run away at night? Or why doesn't he try to contact the police or someone else he knows or who could help him? Wouldn't it be the normal reaction of every child/ human in such a situation? Why is there no one who misses him? So far, it is nothing more than a confused story with a lot of unreasoned ANGST (what very often is a significant sign for a Mary Sue or a Gary Stue. This alone doesn't mean that Wally is a Stue but together with the facts that he beats Yugi and owns Ra as a God Card is a clear sign for it, as well as let your OC be raped or living as a slave. Think about WHAT you do to your character and if it really is NECESSARY to do so. In a fandom like Yu-Gi-Oh! (but also in every other fandom) it is extrem unnecessary and exaggerated to do something like this to your character). Uhm, about the Duelist section and its beginning... No. Just no. At the beginning of the series, Pegasus isn't nice. He sents grandpa Muto into the Shadow Realm so Yugi participates in his tournament. He orders to caught Mokuba and imprisonts him befor he also sents Mokuba into the Shadow Realm. He's not the type of character who would help/ save others (and really not someone who secretly sneaked onto one of his ships) More the opposite – He probably would send Wally into the Shadow Realm with his Millenniums Eye. And even after season one, Pegasus isn't in any condition to help ANYONE (Bakura snatches out his Millenium Eye!) Und that Wally is able to win against Pegasus in Duel Monsters, the man who developed the game... Well. It doesn't show your OC any better than before. There are just a few people who are able to defeat Pegasus in his own game. To name them: Yugi and Kaiba. So especially Wally shouldn't be able (without any explanation and on his first try) to defeat Pegasus if he wasn't able to win against Rebecce some time before. It makes his victory looks really unbelievable and unrealistic. Ich haven't read more but I unfortunately have to say that Wally REALLY seems to be a Gary Stue. If you want to work on him/ improve him, you are welcome to tell me. I would like to help you. Edit: No, no, no, no,no – NO! You CAN'T let Wally win against JADEN, too in a duel. It's already worse to let him win against ONE main protagonist in a duel but TWO REALLY is too much and takes the biscuit to the ground. I mean seriously – WHY? It makes you OC WAAY to powerful and OP. An OC never beats the main protagonist and especially not TWO. Thats a really big sign for a Mary Sue and a Gary Stue. Its a big red flag which says „NO!“ from a hundred miles away. There's nothing to discuss about and even your story being an AU doesn't help. It's just an absolutely „No-Go!“, it's a line which has been crossed. I am sorry but you really can't do that. Please work on your OC and improve him. From DA (You sent me the link today)